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Personal Stories
Just 20 miles south of the bustling capital of Kathmandu is the area in which Green Tara works. It is typical of the setting in which the majority of Nepalis live: rural and hilly, dry and dusty, villages scattered on the hillsides with limited connection by road. Most people live in villages and engage in physically demanding farm work on their land or that of others.
Daxinkali is one of the villages in which Green Tara have set up number of women’s group, through which they give basic training in health issues, particularly around sexual and reproductive health, pregnancy and giving birth. Since the majority of women here do not go to hospitals for check-ups during pregnancy and most give birth without a mid-wife, the training is providing simple yet essential knowledge about looking after themselves and their babies during and after pregnancy.
Anita
Anita is 17 year old girl from the village who recently gave birth to her first child. Her age is typical for a first-time mother in Nepal. She shares a seven by ten foot room with her husband Ashok, and now the baby, where they sleep, cook and eat in close confines. Anita only gave birth five days ago. She is happy to share her story but looks shell-shocked after what she has been through and now being responsible for a child. “Ashok doesn’t earn much money, so when I became pregnant I didn’t go to the hospital because I thought we’d have to pay for it and we don’t have much money.” Anita’s attitude is a common one, that the hospital will charge money for an ante-natal check-up, when in fact it is free. Many women are too shy to go and put themselves in the hands of strangers, and prefer instead to consult with traditional healers in their villages. Luckily friends Anita’s were in health group run by Green Tara and they encouraged her to get a check-up in the Government hospital. They were also able to help her when she started to experience a painful labour. With the support of the group they are able to arrange free transportation to hospital where her baby was delivered. “I am so grateful to my friends. I got so scared when the pains started. Without them I dread to think what would have happened to me. It is due to them that my baby was born healthily and that I know how to care for him properly.” [Anita and Ashok speak proudly about their son’s future and say they are thinking about to give him the education that they never had.]
The women’s groups are not just for pregnant women and new mothers, but for all women in the community. Older and younger women sit together, women of different ethnicities and caste backgrounds, as well as the traditional healers who are an important in sharing health practices to villagers. They are all in the same boat, eager to learn about how to care for themselves and their children, or to pass on the information to relatives and friends.
Indu
Indu is a lady from a high caste and the mother of two children, now in their late teens. She was keen to share her story. As is the custom in Nepal, when Indu got married she moved into her husband’s house and lived with his family. This circumstance can be very unsettling and difficult for the new wife since by tradition she is supposed to serve her husband and her in-laws, as well as any other ‘senior’ members of the household, such as older siblings and their spouses. For Indu this was very much the case. “My first birth was very difficult. I was in labour for five days but my mother-in-law wouldn’t let me go to the hospital. She said ‘I gave birth to eight children at home. Why do you need to go to the hospital?’”. Luckily for Indu she gave birth without any lasting effects, and her first child was a son which improved her status in the household. However, the change attitude of her in-laws didn’t help her much during her second pregnancy. “My second child came out backwards and took a long time to come out. When she did she was blue and not breathing and I thought she was dead. After that I got ill. I couldn’t eat and felt so tired all the time. No-one was looking after me so I went back to my village where my mother took care of me.”
Indu is now an avid advocate of the work of Green Tara. She shares what she has learnt with friends and neighbours, and if she knows a woman whose period has stopped she encourages them to get health check-ups, makes sure there is sufficient iron and vitamins in their diet, and encourages them to come along to the group and learn from the trainers and other women there. She looks forward to the day that her daughter and daughter-in-law will make her a proud grandmother. “I don’t want to repeat the same mistakes with my daughter-in-law as my mother-in-law did. When she is pregnant I will make sure she goes to the hospital and gets nutritious food. I’ll fully look after her. This is my responsibility.”